How Sort Of Not To Pick Up Girls On The Subway

I was out on a Saturday night at some lame club my friend dragged me too. It was so loud I couldn’t hear anything and I had trouble believing that people go to clubs to meet people. (Maybe I’m just getting old.) I approached two different girls but it was so hard to maintain conversations that they just died out.

I was still in the mood to talk to girls on my way home since I couldn’t do it at the club, so when I went down the escalator and saw a pretty girl standing alone I had to do something. I couldn’t have made it more obvious that I was going to talk to her when I positioned myself beside her, but there was no “smooth” way of bypassing less empty spots to stand next to her. (In fact there is no evidence that making a smooth approach increases your odds of success.)

I waited no more than 5 seconds. Any longer and you just start to psych yourself out. She was in what seemed to be gym shorts so said, “It doesn’t seem like you went out tonight.”

“Actually I did but I changed so I wanted look like a whore on the way home.”

Now that’s called “giving encouragement,” where the girl gives a rich answer that lets me take it all sorts of places. My next comments were about the weekend being amateur hour and the horrible club I just came from. She took out a piece of gum and I asked for a piece.

The train came and she went in first. I was very casual about the whole thing. There were no distractions like in a bar so there is less of that urgency to fill every silence. Once inside the train I sat near her and since she wasn’t going anywhere there was no worry of her walking away.

She had a smart ass sense of humor so it was easy to tease her, about her young age and the mosquito bites on her legs. I jokingly asked if she was “intimidated to be talking to an older man,” one of my favorite lines.

I asked her what stop she gets off and since it was one away I decided to go for the number. Nine times out of ten, based on the fun conversation we had, I’m getting a number. In fact I thought the number was such a sure thing that I was already thinking of logistics on how to get out this college girl who doesn’t have a car.

I told her we should hang out for a drink and her reply was, “Haha no.” She laughed at me. There was other passengers around and they saw all this, though they did not make a noise.

I said, “Wow, well, you could have lied and said you had a boyfriend.”

“Well I do have a boyfriend, blah blah blah.” Take a few seconds to think about a girl who would put down a guy instead of telling the truth. With her smart ass personality I guess I wasn’t too surprised.

The stop came and I smiled and told her to have a good night. There’s no point in getting upset, especially since this approach will make it easier for me to do more subway approaches. After a few minutes the burn of her rejection in front of a small crowd wore off and I felt fine. Now I’m more motivated to chat up girls on the subway since I know the odds are way in my favor. 98% of guys in DC never even get up to the point of asking a girl for their number on the subway.

There are two types of guys: those who let rejection get them down and those who use it as fuel to feed the fire. I’m the latter, because I know that part of the game is a numbers game. For every couple rejections there is a nice success. If you stop at a rejection then you stopped too soon.

Having this belief is the reason why I was able to amass such a large amount of experience that led to the writing of Bang, where all the hundreds of approaches I made led to so much success that I was able to pick out the patterns and distill my knowledge into a practical guide. My book makes your learning curve shorter than mine. Click here to learn more.

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